The Real Beginning

It was like Christmas eve as a seven year old … I tossed and turned all night long, most likely only amassing a grand total of only 3 hours of sleep.  In the scheme of things I guess three hours is not that bad, since I’ve been getting closer to 11 every night for the last week or so. 

The reason for the lack of sleep wasn’t anything as exciting as Christmas morning for seven-year-old me … at least not for the majority of people … it is my new job.  In 24 minutes I begin my first day of work at Menlo Park Presbyterian Church.   

I don’t completely understand my anxiety; I know that I won’t be doing much of anything today.  Liz and I will get a tour of Stanford’s campus, of the church campus (almost as daunting), acquire the keys to our respective offices, learn about how to get our e-mail set up, and do other standard “first-day” things … nothing to get too excited about. 

As everyone reading this probably knows, it is not the actual first day that I am anxious about; it is the fact that my new life officially begins now … here … in Menlo Park, CA, where I currently, and for the next year will reside. 

Up until this point I have pretty much just been on an extended vacation, complete with tourist attractions and all. But no more!  I will work … and I will either like it or not … I may like it sometimes and despise it others … but more importantly, I will either serve a good purpose or I will not … I will either be taking part in furthering God’s kingdom on this earth or I will be fighting against it; I cannot sink into luke-warm-ness. 

For me, this hard line is often necessary.  It is scary because luke-warm water is the most comfortable … you get the best of both worlds … the reputation of a devoted follower of Jesus, and the freedom to follow your own agenda whenever Jesus’ isn’t convenient.  I love that!  And so, at least for me, the hard line is necessary.   

The opportunity sits in front of me.  I know that my God will not force me to be devoted to Him; that would subvert the heart of devotion.  I know that I cannot continue to soak in my bath-water either.  I will have to make a choice on my own … will I live my life walking behind (or with) the risen Christ or won’t I?  

Until I move and start over again …

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~ by Will Norman on September 4, 2007.

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